Tuesday, 12 March 2013

OF SWEATY PALMS, BEATING HEARTS AND ANXIOUS MINDS

1 more month (or earlier) would be the arrival of our second child Evan and to date, I am quite sure there’s quite a lot of things that we have yet to do to prepare for his arrival. Talking like pros after having our first, my usual response is always… “What to worry? Got shopping mall all around ma…”. So changing table – not bought yet, clothes – barely/just enough, double breast pump (for my wife of course) – not bought yet, mittens/booties – I think we’ve got this, cotton wool – got some leftover from 2 years ago… well… we’re pretty ready… I think…
 
But apart from the physical preparations, I think I am so much more worried about how emotionally I am prepared to receive another child. Don’t get me wrong, I am very excited and thankful that God has decided to bless us with another child, but the routine that I’ll have to go through again just brings about a cold shiver through my mind, body and soul – it’s really that bad.
 
Days where I’ll have to survived through constantly disrupted sleep, increase in household chores – ESPECIALLY HANGING THE BABIES CLOTHES, washing bottles, sterilizing bottles, boiling water, picking and monitoring 2 kids around the house, bathing 2 kids, changing diapers for 2 kids, changing clothes for 2 kids and that’s not even talking about managing 2 kids through holidays. Especially this year… where I’ve got added responsibility at work, buying, renovating and moving into our new house… my heart feels like it’s got 2 x 10kg dumbbells hanging on it.
 
I think what makes it worst is Athalie going thru a regression period where she needs extra comfort and security these days (knowing that another child is coming along). We use to be able to put her on her own bed (beside our bed) to sleep for at least half the night – but now she insist to sleep on our bed from the very 1st hour (and when asked – “Where’s Evan going to sleep?” she replies, “In the cot la… here no space already”), she was barely waking up for milk and sleeping through the night – but when we told her “Athalie big girl already ya.. no need to wake up for milk k..” she wakes up 3 times to drink milk! and where she was independently walking around, up and down the strairs by herself – she now wants you to carry her. I can only hope and pray that when the baby comes, she understands that we love her same and revert back to her independent self again.
 
But despite all these anxiousness about how to survive, one thing I’ve learned from my experience with Athalie is when the time comes, we humans naturally are made to adapt and survive through it. The most amazing adaptation I ever made was my need for my hours of sleep. In the past before any kids, I would need ample of sleep failing which I would fall ill easily. But when we had Athalie and the super disrupted sleep I had and the near wiping off of my long afternoon naps, I survived. So… this time around… as crazy as I might think it’s going to be… I will survived. To add on further, my compass for survival is my colleague LO – 2 young kids, 2 working adults, no parents/in-laws within a 100km radius, no maid (not even part time) and still survive. So I should be able to survive... fingers cross… here we go…

2 comments:

  1. I don't know to laugh or cry at your post.I've not slept well for 9 months, and even when i do sleep a toddler is constantly on my arms, face, pinching my arms, and i have to go to work the next morning, try getting ready with a toddler following you all around, then bring a toddler down 3 flights of stairs, load the car with whatever stuff that needs to be loaded, throw up quietly from time to time, pray hard that i don't get cramps while i go through traffic congestion with my manual car. And at work, life goes on as usual...papers have to be marked, lectures has to go on as usual. And when the baby comes, i have to load two kids with extra stuff, go work, find time to pump...etc..etc..you get to reach work with clean crisp shirt, before i get out of the house, my clothes are already messy and I'm sweaty, but who cares right. Don't even get me started with the emotional turmoil that i have to go through during confinement. Sigh...i'm just a very stressed up pregnant women now.

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  2. Definitely dear... If mine is sweaty palms.. Urs definitely wud be heart attack liow.. Thanks so much for all ur sacrifices... Without u i'll probably be dead by now... Thanks so much dear..

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