ATHALIE TURNS 1...

Tomorrow Athalie (my other baby girl) turns 1 and I can’t help but to reflect back at the 2-years that that has passed… from the time of conception to the birth of Athalie.

In no way was the journey thus far a fast one (as claimed by everyone else around who constantly tell us “wah… so fast liow ho… so big liow”) and in no way was the journey an easy one… It was a journey where our lives were turned 180 degrees in the span of the 2 years... through the years I have shared bits and pieces of how different life has been for us so here’s a recap:

Item	Before	After
Getting ready to go out	45 mins	1 and ½ hrs
Night Sleep	8 hrs uninterrupted	8 hrs very interrupted
Afternoon Nap (on weekends)	3 hrs	1 hr
Going Out Items	HP, wallet & car keys	HP, wallet, car keys, milk feed, bottle, 2 types of snacks, flask, change of clothes, diapers, diaper cream, yu-ee oil, changing mat, wet wipes, breast-feeding poncho, stroller, baby bjorn.
Going Out Attire	Stylish	Backpacker (even to formal events.. thanks to the backpack with all her items in it)
Eating Out Setting	Nice, quiet, slow	Express
Breast Visibility Outdoor	0%	80% (of cuz covered by the poncho)
Couple Time	Everyday	Barely
Visit to the Clinic	Once quarterly	Monthly (sometimes weekly)
I call my wife…	Dear	Mummy

But change is change and we just have to accept it, adapt to the new setting and move on.

Taking a step back, the journey thus far has certainly exposed me to a new level of happiness that I have never experienced before.

The first time my heart literally leaped was when I saw Athalie’s heartbeat on the scanning machine. That split second moment of joy, thankfulness, awe and other unexplainable emotions just poured in. It wasn’t one of the moments where you shed a tear in happiness but it was a moment you are just frozen dumbfounded happy at the life that is shown on the screen (as small as it might be). It was INCREDIBLE!

Next would be her birth itself. Her delivery was a super long and tiring one but the moment she came out from you know where… all I could do was to stand in attention not knowing what to do or how to react to the life that was just born. For the past 9 mths, it was looking at her thru the screen and watching her grow. But now… it’s out, alive, kicking and screaming and I just felt incapable of handling something so fragile and precious (less I accidentally break her arm, drop her, squeeze her too tight). Still in the state of shock… I walked over to where they place her (some see-through bucket)… gently stroke my fingers across her arm and it was a beautiful moment. Beaitiful. Beautiful.

The other amazing experience with Athalie is watching her achieve new milestone every now and then… turning to her back and back, crawling, sitting up, standing up, climbing the stairs, climbing down the bed… and looking back at the videos that I’ve captured… everytime she achieves something… I automatically scream with joy (something which I certainly don’t do most of the time). The reaction is immediate, uncontrolled and totally unplanned. The excitement of watching her achieve something is something I cannot contain.

Finally, it’s the feeling of being loved by a daughter that brings about so much comfort to the craziness of the world. Her just falling asleep on my shoulder just creates so much warmth within me. To know that I am someone in the world. To know that the sacrifices made were all worth it for that single moment. To know that I did it. And these are some moments that I always wish would last a lot longer.

Athalie definitely brings about so much joy in the house. Her cheekiness, cheerfulness and cuteness just continues to fill the house with giggles and laughter at the things that she does. This is the one reason why I endeavor to leave work on time everyday cause it breaks my heart to see Athalie asleep when I get back from work cause that would mean I would not have interacted with her for 48 hrs straight! Someone once told me “It’s ok wan… later on in life only will make more sense to spend more time with her cause she’ll be more aware by then”… but that’s totally bogus… outright crazy. Life is very simple. The more time you spend with someone, the more attach you both become. I can clearly see this with Athalie. If I spend enough time with her, she becomes comfortable enough for me to put her to sleep.

On this day, looking back, I am really thankful on how God has faithfully seen us through and through. From the time we planned for a child, to the wonderful gynae we had, to the birth, to her growing up, her temperament, her health, her everything. As tough and crazy it was, I know that God has never given us anything that we could not handle and Athalie has been an amazing baby and exceptionally well  behaved.

To my wife, who have sacrificed a lot more sleep and sweat than I have, thank you so much and I love you very much.

To Athalie, although Daddy once told someone that I am an easy going and would have no problem with you dating anyone by the time you were 18 cause you’ll be an adult by then… through this 1 year, my stand has changed (when I realized that I felt a strong sense of protectionism when I saw a photo of you kissing Andrew thru a glass window – though it was an innocent one)… I think daddy is going to have trouble letting you go even though it’s only been 1 year. Daddy loves you very much and thank you for bringing joy and happiness to both Mummy and Daddy… and Daddy is certainly looking forward to the many years ahead with you.

p/s Daddy is now an official member of DADD – Daddies Against their Daughters Dating