Idiosyncrasy – the syncing of idiots all in one place (Rojaking, 2011)
As the name suggest, this segment is targeted at consolidating idiots in this blog.
Before I begin writing about other idiots around, I think it’s only fair that I begin with myself. After all, being a true Malaysian, I must comply with the Malay proverb that says, “Satu jari tunjuk olang, 4 jari tunjuk balik sendiri” even though I have no idea how the 4th finger is able to point back to oneself (but 3 is good enough)
There are of course many times where I am guilty of being an idiot, but I think the most apparent one would be my idiotic expectation with my wife.
Some of the idiotic expectations I have are:
a. To have the house spanking clean everytime
b. No messiness at the dining table
c. No toys lying around on the floor
d. No un-wash plates in the sink
Of course from an outsider point of view, my expectations might seem legit. I feel like I work a lot more (cause I have to do the 9am – 6pm while her hours are flexible) and because of that I deserve to come back to a perfect looking house, I deserve to put my legs up and call it a day, I deserve to frown upon her when I’m not happy with how things are done and I deserve the right to choose what to do and what I don’t feel like doing. To top it all up, especially when I come back late tired and all, I have an extra right to darken my face, be sarcastic and show my frustration all because I’m the breadwinner! I’m the man! I’m the MCP!
Just plain stupid.
Oftentimes I forget how much more tired she is. True she has very flexible hours (ie not bounded 9-6, work from home etc), but that doesn’t mean she has any less to do. Her typical day goes like this (WE DO NOT HAVE A MAID):
Work work work..
6pm – Have dinner & feed baby @ in-laws
7pm – Back home
8pm – Put baby to sleep
8:30pm - Wash clothes
- Wash bottles
- Wash pump
- Wash pump
- Pack baby’s bag for the next day
- Cook baby food
9:30pm – Baby wakes up – put baby back to sleep
10:00pm – Complete work brought back from office
12am – 7am – Sleep – Disrupted sleep every 2-3 hours as she breastfeeds the baby and has to keep waking to change the baby’s position (Left, Right, Left, Right). And if the baby cries… she’s the one that soothes the baby back to sleep while daddy just sleeps on like a pig or fidgets around in frustration that my sleep is being disrupted.
Many times, I totally fail to understand the amount of things that she needs to juggle and how tired she has to be at the end of the day. I know if I was to go through what she has to go through EVERYDAY, I would probably end up buying wood, knocking it to a square, digging a hole and burying myself in it. All I have to do most of the day is to do my 9-6pm and I’m pretty much a free man in the evening.
When I was in between jobs, I took up the challenge of taking care of the baby the whole week without sending her to my in-laws… and by the time my wife reaches home in the late afternoon, I was already so drain and could not even do anything for the rest of the day.
Having gone through 30% of what my wife goes through should have given me added empathy and that’s why I am putting myself in this blog post. I am an idiot.
How can I expect my wife to achieve my crazy expectation when I myself could not even do it when I was doing 30% of what she was doing? How can I treat her with such sarcasm just because I had a tiring day? How can I frown at her just because my boss was an idiot too on that day? 2 idiots don’t make a right.
So easily I forget the sacrifices she has made and how much more crazier her live has been. So easily I ignore the fact that I myself am irrational with my expectation and forget the other amazing stunts she has achieve and so easily I stand on a pedestal thinking I’m the king of the world and my rights are right.
I am an idiot.
To my beloved wife, I stand here today guilty of being an idiot. I’m sorry for the times I was sarcastic, assuming your life was easier, and having unrealistic expectations on how things should be. I know you had to put up with my hurtful comments, stupid looking face when I am frustrated and being plain lazy by not helping you out enough. I am sorry. I definitely promise to always try to understand the burdens you have to go through everyday and make it a point to help you our wherever possible. I love you and I’m sorry for being an idiot.
Next up… my best friend…
No comments:
Post a Comment